Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Shark Hunter (2001)

I love shark movies. That means I love bad shark movies, because only a couple of them are actually good films. But Shark Hunter is particularly bad, mostly because it takes place almost entirely in a submarine. So we miss those wonderful shots of dorsal fins cutting through the surface, and hot girls screaming at the beach. Basically, all those things we love about shark movies are missing from this shark movie.

It begins with a flashback. A family of three is on a little boat on the ocean during a foggy night. The first big question is, What’s up with the boy’s voice? As we’re wondering that, something big attacks the boat, and sadly the boy survives.

Then, in the present, the boy – Spencer – is an adult (and is played by Antonio Sabato, Jr.). He is giving a college lecture, which is interrupted by his colleague, William (Christain Toulali - yes, that is how he's credited in this film). William tells him he won’t be able to use the special submarine that he designed. That couldn’t wait until the end of his lecture? College tuition is expensive, and these interruptions are being paid for by all of those students.

Meanwhile in some underwater laboratory (it’s really unclear what the purpose of this place is), a guy is smoking a cigarette. That seems unwise, and also unkind to the others who have to share that limited space. But then to simplify matters, a giant shark comes and starts eating people. It rams the facility, causing the place to explode.

Spencer and William are hired to investigate. Intense music plays while Spencer looks at slides of sharks. Then they go on the submarine that Spencer was so excited about. We meet the crew of the sub, all the usual characters, including Harrington, who displays an attitude for no particular reason. Playing one of the crew members is Velizar Binev, who also has roles in Shark Zone and Raging Sharks. Good for him.

A diver goes down and finds a body. Nice makeup job on the body’s face. Too bad they ran out of makeup before they got to his neck. Well, the diver finds a giant tooth (just like in Jaws, only bigger, and he’s able to hold onto it). It’s that of a Megalodon, a shark thought to be extinct. Spencer is certain it’s the same fish that ate his parents, and he’s out for revenge.

However, Cheryl  reminds him that they’re scientists, and that they should capture the fish and study it. By the way, Cheryl (Heather Marie Marsden) is the only woman in the movie, but fortunately she’s kind of cute. Except when she does her pouty face. The shark too has a pouty, angry face. Perhaps that’s why she wants to capture it, rather than kill it. She calls it “Meg.”

At one point Harrington says, “Guys, we’re gonna need a bigger sub,” briefly reminding us of a much better shark movie.

Shark Hunter was directed by Matt Codd.

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